A Question on Exposure…

I would like to invite some comments, advice & discussion here.  I’ve searched and googled forums etc, for advice on how to gain more ‘traffic’ through my site.  Also, how to gain feedback/ discussion/ dialog with others from my writing.

There seems to be very little (or my searching was very superficial) in terms of advice apart from the following;

  • Post regularly


  • Follow others


  • Like others posts


  • Comment on others posts


  • Use time as your friend


My question to you, lovely people is whether there any other, additional activities you’ve done that you’ve seen work?  I’m keen to gain feedback, to start conversations and to meet new writers.  Further inspiration is out there but how to tap into it..?

Happy new year to you all!


Confess, Why?

via Daily Prompt: Confess

The word, confess, brings so much to my mind.  Mostly negative thoughts.  Mostly linked to the notion of confessing ones sins to the church which, in my mind is the Catholic Church.

Now, I must state that this is just what comes to my mind when I see or hear that word.  I am not a Catholic.  I have never been in a confessional booth too confess.

If someone was to tell me there is a need for me to confess then I believe my reaction would be to roll my eyes and say, ‘Why?  What is it that you know that I do not?  Is there something you feel you need to confess?’  I might walk way!


Now when you look at the word in a dictionary it does open up the word…. a little;

‘to admit that you have done something wrong or something that you feel guiltyor bad about’

For the first time, I’m now thinking about this word and if I have or have had a relationship with it.

There are things I have felt bad about.  There are things I have done wrong.  This would be the same for all people.  If everyone were to confess everything they feel bad about or had done wrong, would this help them?  Would it help those who are receiving the confession? Is it selfish not to confess?

I have confessed in the past.

I have confessed to loved ones that I feel I may have hurt.

I have confessed when I’ve done something, even if minor, that I feel bad about.

The key for me is the use of the word I.  I’ve confessed when I feel guilty or when I feel bad.  Why would I do this when I risk hurting others or hurting myself or how others see me?

Is it Conscience?  Is it Heart?  Is it Spirit?  Is it the Spirit that lives within me?

Is it love?  I think so.

So, thinking a little further on the word of the day, I do in-fact choose to confess.

However, I do not do it because I’m told too or because others say I need too to find inner peace or enlightenment.  I do not do it to fit into a select group.

I confess for others to know the real meI confess to remain openI confess to build relationshipI confess to learn.

I confess because I love and because I know, I am loved.

Come, follow me and walk with me in the garden.

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#4 Will The Wheel Finally Come Off?

I have been putting of writing the next instalment of my wife and I’s adventure.  Why?  Because it took place over 9 years ago, so much has taken place since then and I have been concerned about not being able to provide the detail – dates/ times/ place names…

However, I’ve decided to go ahead.  I feel I owe it to myself and of course, to my readers.  So please forgive me if I pass some areas too quickly or you feel some of the normal depth is missing.  I will endeavour to paint a picture of both interest and substance.

My wife to be and I landed in Delhi, walked through a crowded and unremarkable arrivals.  We picked up our backpacks and hauled them onto our backs.  Then bent down and picked up our front packs but… avoided putting them on our fronts… not a cool look (that wouldn’t last!).

We walked out of the building and onto a busy pickup area.  There were so many people rushing around and they all had one thing in common – they all seemed to know exactly where they were going.  I think that it was at this point that it hit me – I should have read all the guide books I had purchased.  Apart from booking the first night at a recommended hotel, I had nothing planned.  Here we were standing in the heat and dust of Delhi and we had no idea what to do next.

IMG_0618Delhi, Busy Street1

OK, hotel.  We have the address.  We need dot get there.  Taxi!

Delhi Taxi

After speaking to the driver of the first taxi we came across our confidence grew a little.  He knew the address we showed him and also the hotel itself.

In we got, backpacks in the boot and front packs on our lap.  Windows up and we were off… rather slowly.  As we ‘sped’ along my concern began to grow and my confidence dip.  For some reason, as he drove forward, he kept winding down his window, leaning out and looking backwards.  Now, this was a new country and I knew the style of driving would be very different to back home in the UK but surely you should look in the same direction as you were driving?

This kept happening and I began to wonder if something was following us… and then he stopped the car and jumped out.  He walked back, past our door and to the rear of the car.  There was a banging and I peered out just in time to see him furiously kicking the back wheel.  Apparently all was just fine and it was just the small matter of the rear right wheel coming lose and required kicking back on every few miles to stop it coming right off.  So it all made sense.  Thank goodness!

With the wheel ‘securely’ back on straight, off we went on our way to the hotel.  A few more miles and a few more stops.  At least I guess it was a good way to knock out any frustration he might have in life.  Maybe we all need a ‘loose wheel’ in our lives.  He stopped again but this time didn’t get out, he just looked confused.  Was it because the wheel was still on the car..?  He turned around and said that he’d forgotten how to find the hotel.

Back to feeling unprepared, in a very foreign country and not knowing what to do next. We tried talking to him, asking directions but achieved nothing.  It’s OK he said, he would take us to an official tourist office who would be able to help us.

With a quick glance at the wheel and a shrug, we were on our way again.  Only a short distance to the travel agent.  We walked into the office and shook hands with a friendly, professional looking man.  There was a large poster on the wall behind him displaying what I recognised as the official minister of tourism slogan and image.

Incredible India

Again, I began to relax… again.

He said, ‘do not worry, I will call your hotel’ and he picked up the phone and dialled the number.  The call ended and he told us some bad news, after speaking with our hotel it seems they had overbooked and no longer had our room.


‘Do not worry, they have a sister hotel and it is very close!.  One of my staff will take you there now’.

I was suspicious do not get me wrong.  However, no money had changed hand, I had said I would not pay the taxi driver extra and he didn’t mind.  A young man drive us in his little air conditioned car, stopped outside a decent looking little hotel and carried our bags in.  They knew our names and seemed to be expecting us.  I mentioned the other hotel and they said that it had been overbooked but again, they were the sister hotel and so not to worry.  The rate and room would be the same.

As I’m righting all I’m thinking is,

Stop Light & Sign  & Stop Light & Sign&Stop Light & Sign

In that hotel I was thinking; We are safe; We are in a hotel and everyone speaks English; there is air conditioning; no one has asked for money; everything seems plausible and I’m really happy the wheel stayed on.

The young man said he would come back the following day and take us around a tour of Delhi at a small cost.  We had made no plans beyond our hotel and so, after discussing the cost (which was very cheap) we agreed, shook hands and parted ways.

Out bags were taken to our room which seemed OK.  It was late however, I wanted to take a quick look around.  We went down stairs and headed out the door.  We made it to the corner, looked up and down the street, realised we had no idea where we were or even if it was a safe neighbourhood, turned around and went back up to our room for a sleep.

What is was like to not have a mobile phone – no maps – no calls – texts – Whats App…  I couldn’t do it now!

After a short while I woke to a strand sound in the room…  Lights on I investigate and traced the sound to an air conditioning unit in the wall.  I turned it off but the sound only grew.  It was a bird nesting/ stuck on the other side of the unit.  This continued all night but was the least of the issues…

In the middle of the night my wife put on the light.  Amazingly, I had just fallen asleep and was slightly irritated at being woken.  ‘What is it?’  ‘Something is biting me!’  Getting in her silk sleeping bag liner and tying it tight around her, the light went back off and the bird started off again.

A little sleep later and the sun was up.  A new day had started and the two sleep deprived and slightly lost travellers had woken.    My wife seemed very uncomfortable and couldn’t stop scratching.  Off came the silk liner and out came my wife, just not as I knew her.

She was covered from head to toe in the most horrific looking, angry red bites!  We had no idea what was causing them but guessed is was mosquitoes. Or something similar.  Anyway, our driver and guide awaited.  A couple of anti-histamine and anti-itch cream applied and we went down, front packs over one shoulder (I think two makes you look like you’re on a continental European school trip!).

So far, one flight missed flight (but I was cooking a mean roast chicken at the time) and 364 days of travel instead of the planned 365; no luck getting an upgraded on the hastily booked new flight we managed to catch; lots of alcohol; to many films and not enough sleep; a wheel that a) stayed on and b) possible released some tension; an ‘overbooked?’ hotel; a hastily booked new hotel; a very flappy bird (could have inspired a brand new mobile game and made me millions!) and an AC unit that didn’t work (lucky we weren’t in an incredibly hot country); bitey things in our room and a couple of new, soon to be a little too clingy, friends from our local Ministry of Tourism ‘Official’ Tourist Office!

Not bad for our first 48 hours of our world tour!

More to come on our first full day in Delhi – Mosques; shrines; chipmunks; food (not related to the aforementioned chipmunks), colour (American’s, this is the correct spelling.  Also, boot of the car mentioned earlier is what you may describe as the ‘trunk’); dirt; a chase up the street and lessons in loosing a tail.

Even with our new challenges, we had come with the state of mind that could cope with this and do it with, even if hidden below the surface, with adventure and happiness in our hearts.

Delhi Bright Sari

We were in India!

Come, follow me and walk with me in the garden.

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#3 Take Off..?

We’d packed in our jobs and all our worldly possessions, gathered over the last 30 years were packed in boxes, parent’s lofts, grandparent’s garages, aunt and uncles farms and storage facilities.   I was relaxed and excited.  I’d even cooked a roast dinner for my partner’s family and us.

Backpack Clip

Sitting in their lounge with back and front packs waiting in the hall, one year of travel around the world lay before us.  Passports, visas and boarding passes to hand and expectant, excited smiles on our faces.

I had a nagging feeling though.  I couldn’t shake it.  Each time I dismissed it as nerves it would subtly come back.  One last check of the passports.  One last check of the boarding passes and then…



Why does the ticket say AM…?  Double checking my watch/ my phone…. It’s definitely PM now…  We had missed our very first flight!  The flight that would take us from London to Delhi.  The flight that would be the start of 365 days of exploration;


UK – India – Hong Kong (HK) – Philippines and our wedding – HK – China – HK – Thailand.


From there we’d planned to go through Laos – Cambodia – Vietnam – Malaysia – New Zealand – Brazil – Bolivia – Uruguay – the United States – Home

What followed was a panicked phone call to the airline.  Panic that our tickets would be cancelled and our trip ended before it had even begun.  Then, relief as our ticket was transferred to the same flight but on the following day.  Sadness that our first flight on an A380 would be bumped to a 747 but still, massive relief.

However, this was shortly followed by embarrassment.  Embarrassment caused by having to update my family` on the reason I was calling at all, ‘shouldn’t I be on a plane?’.  Updating them on our ‘progress’ and the fact that our trip had been shortened from 365 days to 364!

Another night spent in London.

Then, the next day arrived in all its glory.  An early trip to the airport.  A bottle of Prosecco consumed in the departures area and a call to the gate.

Sat on the plane, not in business or first class, that attempt had failed, but still deliciously happy and more celebratory drinks on order.

We’d made it!

India, here we come.


No, really…  Here. We. Come!

Come, follow me and walk with me in the garden.

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#2 Horizon


The desire to expand my horizons has always been there.  I this innate in me or partly due to growing up in a small English town.  One thing is for certain, experiences whilst growing up fuelled this desire and not just the calling of genetics or soul.


In part, this desire was formed by the Christian upbringing I was given.  Not traditional but broad, open, inclusive and locational and culturally mixed.  I learnt about faith and not just about people but equality of people.  I learnt about love, logic and my need to continually grow and understand more.  I met new brothers and sisters.  I was sometimes disappointed.  I’m not sure why but when I meet Christians I think I almost expect to meet an almost perfect person.  Someone with broad learning, sound, intelligent thinking and a degree of open mindedness and empathy.  People that love.  I was sometimes uplifted.  It is amazing when a person is generous with their love and with their actions.  I loved finding life and growth and not just stagnation and doctrine.  I also loved the global aspect – Freedom of choice for all of humanity.

Buddleia: Also known as the 'Butterfly Bush' because its nectar attracts so many insects, you can see it flourishing in parks and gardens all over the country

Part came from the beautiful but often troubled brothers and sisters that came into my life, my family and then left, sometimes without notice, at varied times later on.  Fostering can be tough, very tough but also marvellous.  I feel sadness when thinking back to the glimpses of childhood shared with them and knowing that I will never meet any of them again and not know what became of them.  Some were so ill, others had been abused and some so quiet but all beautiful.  I recently drove past my old childhood home and peering over the beach hedge I helped plant, I could see one of the plants we planted to remember these children – every child had one planted somewhere in our garden.  How tall the buddleia is now, how broad!  How tall is that child/ adult now..?  However, along with the sadness comes hope.  They were brought into our family for a reason and with the constant battle with social services aside, I believe they were each as blessed as we were by their presence in our family, however brief.

There was one though.  One that came into the family before me.  One that I know the height of.  One that I know what they are doing right now – soundly sleeping & dreaming back in my house!  One that came into our family to stay.  My sister.  Adopted.  That was the term used by the state, the legal term.  To me, too my family it’s far more simple.  Our sister, daughter.  How fortunate we are.

Image result for green vauxhall cavalier gls

Another area that shaped my awareness of the wider world came from journeying to the continent with family.  Some years we would drive to the south of the UK, onto a ferry for 4-5 hours and then into France.  As the years went on we would venture down to the south coast in our Vauxhall Cavalier – which at that time, had no A/C, no seat belts/ no electric windows and was rather cramped.  Picture if you will, 2 adults and 3 ‘children’; roof rack on; boot full; bedding along the back seat; pillows on laps; no air conditioning; 800 miles of driving to get to our destination; temperatures of up to 40 degrees (in the shade); blue cheese ripening in the glove box (not cooled & certainly not for me) and little fans that would weakly blow hot air at you.  However, even the journey brought joys of the world unknown let alone the stop overs or final destinations; the food; wine; hot chocolate (French); scenery; chateaux’s; language; music; heat; beaches; festivals; music; culture; people we would meet…. I could go on and on…

Family played a key role.  Grandparents that loved France and had traveled the world.  A painting is hanging above my fireplace at home that they brought back from the Philippines before my birth.  Parents who took us on annual holidays around the UK and the continent.  An older sister who went inter-railing around Europe when I was young and went travelling around the world more than once.  The same sister who moved out of the family home whilst I was still at school, to attend medical school in London – the Big Smoke.  I still remember having to jog to keep up with her, wide eyed at the urban life all around me.

I started to flex my wings by choosing to go to college in a nearby ‘city’ rather than stay on at the 6th form upper school.  This took me from a small town school with two non-white students to a college with a broad mix of cultures, views and experiences.  Were there tough times?  Yes, changes in courses; a racially motivated attack and a trip to the hospital; differences of opinions with lecturers however, the list of good times was far longer.  I also built a really diverse group of friends.

The next, broader flex came when moving on to university.  All but one choice was based in London so it was London I went to.  Many year later, I’m still here!  London compared to my childhood town were poles apart.  I’ve lived in areas where I was in a minority for the first time.  Places where the majority had their routes in the same place as my attackers at collage.  How did this make me feel?  I joined in, learnt to cook the food, socialised and grew a little more as a person.  You see, I do not see race linked with actions.  I see race as a label linking people with a common ancestry.  I see actions as a result of the person they choose to be whilst being mindful of the experiences they’ve had, the opportunities in life they’ve received and the love in their lives.   I now live in an area that is a little more like my childhood town.  Co-incidence?  No.  I still miss that part of my childhood life growing up surrounded by the countryside, the trees and wild life and the quiet.  It’s not so quite but does have one big advantage, the social make up is diverse!  There are people with origins from all over the world living and working all around me; a family from central Africa on my right; India straight ahead; London to my left.  It is great.  Uni also gave me an expanded group of friends who now live all over the country and wider world.

After uni I gained a job with a company in the travel industry.  One day, I was introduced to a new temp. in my department.  That ‘temp.’ is now my wife and not temp. in any sense of the word.  She had just returned from spending a year traveling and working in Australia and intended to save money to complete a dedicated career degree.  Even when I wasn’t travelling, the world was coming to me.

One day and after seven years I managed to negotiate redundancy from my work place.  Why did I want this? I know it can be so awful if it isn’t something that fits your life.  Well, my then girlfriend re-awakened the desire in me to see and experience more of the world and she also gave me the perfect companion to share this with.  I never wanted to be one of those people that listens to others experiences but has little to offer back.  I needed to get myself out into the world.  I wanted to learn how other people live and how they see life.  Oh yes, and we were to be married along the way!

So, my work ended, we packed up our lives, we said good bye to our loved ones and got set to leave on our world adventure.  Little did we know quite what an adventure it would be or all the pain it would cause us and our families and friends.  Also, we could imagine the amazing people we would meet, the beautiful places we would see and the life it would bring.

The happiest of times & the worst of times.

The unplanned course it would take & the force we’d be subjected to.

Ripping us apart but not in control.

The control lay elsewhere.  Our strength our life & above all things,


This story, I feel lies later on and we have reached the end of this chapter.  What it means to grow, to understand the world a little better, to meet people, understand disappointment but reach for a connection.  To have empathy, joy, creativity and love.  To take action and not be discouraged.  To find understanding and ones purpose in life.

The journey continues.

The next stop, India.

Come, follow me and walk with me in the garden.

If you’d like to read more then follow my blog to be notified of further posts.  If you’d like to leave a comment, opinion or feedback  or just say high then it would be wonderful to hear from you.  The comment box is just below 


#1 First Post & Introduction

Sat in a coffee shop, “Organically” with my sparkling water in a elegant glass bottle and a flat white with a fern leaf decorating the top and rich, dark coffee escaping around the edges.  Aviators on the table, Sennheiser’s channelling Loyle Carner from the iPhone.

Never having read a blog, never having written a blog but thinking it may be something I would enjoy, it might even have a positive therapeutic value.  What can I write about?  Can people read the words, appreciate their choice and meaning whilst ignoring the dyslexia of the writer (had to Google the correct spelling of dyslexia (someone was having a laugh when they came up with that name))?

Life.  Love.  Experience.  Hardship.  Blessings.  Spirit.  Purpose.  Regret.  Anxiety.  Fulfilment.  Work.  Money.  Photography.  Beauty.  Walking with Him.  Sadness.  Happiness…?

Life: I have lived life rich & full.  Love: My life is covered in love – always has been.  Experience: I’ve had some – here and there.  Hardship:yes but how can you compare to others in this world that do know hardship in their life.  Blessings:  I’m blessed – no two ways about it.  Spirit: Fulfilled? Potential met?  At piece?  Purpose:  What is my purpose in life?  What is our purpose?  Regret:  No.  I have none.  Anxiety: hmm.  I do not like it. Fulfilment: Is this hard to reach?  When you know what is happening in the world…  When you see life unfold for not just yourself but others…  Work:  We are designed to work but do we work as we find it or search for more?  Money:important at the same time as unimportant.  Photography:  Love it.  Beauty. There is so much beauty in the world.  Walking with Him: Essential but there are so many distractions in life.  Sadness: I have sadness in my heart but I think it is unavoidable and can be there for other purposes than to pull you down.  Happiness: We all deserve this.  What is there without the chance of this?

So, this is it.  Coffee is almost gone.  It was delicious.  Sparkling water is coming with me, bottle to be re-used.  Really enjoyed the album ‘Yesterday’s Gone’ although I’ve not listened to the words and so can’t yet recommend.

I hope I’ve not bored you.  This just the ramblings of a ‘blogger’ with no experience or clear focus/ plan.  Any feedback on the direction I should take would be appreciated.  I think I will discuss my world travels; the countries we’ve visited and the people we’ve met.  I may cover certain life events which drastically altered the course we were on.  I will put up some of my photography and writing.  I may just cover what is flowing through my mind at the time.

Let us see.

If you’d like to read more then please do follow my blog.  If you’d like to leave a comment, opinion or feedback  or just say high then it would be wonderful to hear from you.  The comment box is just below